I told the story of my first kiss as part of my Tube Mommy essay. Are any other Pontificators brave enough to share their FK story? Typically in Ashes, the writing can be fact or fiction and you don’t have to say which. I could be a curmudgeon and say “true stories only,” but maybe it would be more fun if we left it open.
Non-members can leave their FK stories in the comments too!
This is a quick-and-dirty cover of Johnny Cash’s “Folsom Prison Blues” I did for my band. I was trying to sell them on the idea of a hard rock version of this song in Drop D tuning, and they just didn’t get the picture. So I did this demo of what I was hearing in my head. By no means a finished product, this is the musical equivalent of one of Charlie’s quick pencil sketches.
I rode the Tube alone back to the hotel the first night. Peter was there to hold my hand (not quite literally) on the way down in the morning. The Tube station has two doors to the street, and they were shutting one down with a folding steel grate when I walked up at 10:00 p.m.
“Oh shit,” I thought, and hurried around to the other side of the building, which was still open. Phew. I was a little nervous about the Tube, since it played on two classic travel fears: Lost In A Strange Town, and Not Knowing How We Do Things Here. But after some fumbling with buying and presenting a ticket, I found the right platform and was headed north.
The route was clearly marked on wall charts, and current and next stops were announced by electric marquees and a friendly recorded female voice. She had just the right accent to make her sound educated yet approachable. She’s the sort who would give you clear directions you could trust — not that a guy could ever bring himself to ask. Best of all, with her you didn’t have to.
With Tube Mommy guiding me home, I had little chance of missing my stop at Belsize Park, so I was able to relax and enjoy my journey more. That’s when I noticed Iso-Boy.
1. Grill Tri-Tip steak on a gas or charcoal grill. Season with salt, pepper, and garlic powder as you grill. (Note: Tri Tip steak is not much more expensive than Chuck or Round, but cooks up much more tender. It’s the best deal on beef steak in terms of price-vs.-tenderness).
2. Chill the grilled meat overnight. The next day, slice the steak into thin bite-sized medallions.
3. Prepare the sauce using the following ingredients in proportions that seem good to you:
* Finely minced raw hot, sweet, or green onions
* Sesame seeds
* Whole Foods Soy-Ginger marinade
* Thin the sauce a little with white wine or hard apple cider
I have not tried the following yet, but think they might go well in the sauce if used in moderation:
* Minced fresh basil or rosemary
* Sriracha hot sauce or Thai sweet chili sauce
4. Arrange the sliced meat prettily on a plate and drizzle with the sauce. Stand back to avoid being crushed by hungry guests.
GIVE ME BIG PIECES OF CHALK
To clutch in my grubby fist
I need Light Sky Blue
Lemon-Pudding-With-Milk Yellow
And the shade of Pink
That is only found in flowers
Orange too, if you have it
I DON’T CARE
If my neck gets sunburned
I don’t care
If my knees get scraped
I don’t care
If I miss the good shows on TV
I NEED TO DRAW A BUTTERFLY
AS BIG AS ME
Another heart-stoppingly good recipe from everybody’s favorite uncle.
1. Put two frying pans on medium heat.
2. Slice a piece of ham into large bite-size pieces — nickel-to-quarter sized. Put the ham in pan 1 with a generous pat of butter. Fry up, stirring occasionally.
3. Slice a thick piece of bread (at least as thick as your thumb). Butter generously on one side and put it in the second frying pan, dry side down.
I grew up in the yellow house on River Road: the one with the clump of California poppies at the base of the mailbox post. The house is still there, but it is no longer yellow. The poppies are still there, but they have spread twenty feet in either direction along the edge of the road.
The hill is still there too. Of course a hill wouldn’t go anywhere.
Bicycle
It’s cloudy tonight, the whole sky is covered
The full moon is hiding, but I know she’s there
‘Cause I can see a faint glow, I can feel her tides tuggin
And I’m certain she’s shining on someone somewhere
The sad stranger passed away on Tuesday. No matter what else I am, I am also my father’s son. This could be his song as much as it is mine.
I have been famous for being obscure
And I got me a fine set of symptoms, but nary a cure
I’ve struggled hard at my life
Sustaining an effort just barely enough to get by
But I’m still in there pluggin
I still gotta try
